Archive for the 'Jokes' Category
PlayStation 3 Frenzy
Q: What is 10 km. long and never had sex?
A: The line for PS3
supadupagama writes:
Nine days until Sony?s PlayStation 3 launches in America, and lines are already forming.
A CAG forumer went to Best Buy this morning and saw about 7 people waiting outside. He went inside and one of the workers told him that they [...]
World’s funniest joke
A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn’t seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! [...]
Romanians and terrorism
10 Reasons why us romanians can?t be terrorists:
1. 8:45 am is too early for us to be up.
2. We are always late, we would have missed all 4 flights.
3. Pretty people on the plane distract us.
4. We would talk loudly and bring attention to ourselves.
5. With food and drinks on the plane, we would forget [...]
European Union Language
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known [...]
Funny tech support calls
Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?
Female customer: A white one…
===============
Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can’t get my diskette out.
Tech support: Have you tried pushing the Button?
Customer: Yes, sure, it’s really stuck.
Tech support: That doesn’t sound good; [...]
Funny Anagrams
An anagram is a type of word play, the result of rearranging the letters of a word or phrase to produce other words, using all the original letters exactly once.
George Bush – He bugs Gore
Dormitory – Dirty Room
Evangelist – Evil’s Agent
Desperation – A Rope Ends It
The Morse Code – Here Come Dots
Slot Machines – Cash [...]
Sixty amazing facts
Another funny e-mail circulating around…. I wonder who invents this stuff. Some look genuine though.
Sixty Amazing-but-True Facts!
o In the weightlessness of space a frozen pea will explode if it comes in contact with Pepsi.
o The [...]
Proof the world is nuts
In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female.Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.
(Like THAT makes sense.)
In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman?s genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination.He may only see their [...]
Invented words
A radio station was running a competition – words that weren’t in the dictionary yet could still be used in a sentence that would make logical sense. The prize was a trip to Bali.
DJ: “96 FM here, what’s your name?”
Caller: “Hi, my name’s Dave.”
DJ: “Dave, what’s your word?”
Caller: “Goan… spelt G-O-A-N pronounced ‘go-an’.”
DJ: “You are [...]
Lateral Thinking
Try to think outside the box. Also try not to look at the answers below and don’t think of this as a quiz.
1.
man
————
board
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Answer: man overboard
Let’s see how you do next….
2.
stand
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i
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Answer: I understand
Got how this works? Let’s see what’s next…
3. /r/e/a/d/i/n/g/
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Answer: Reading between the lines
4.
-r
road
-a
-d
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Answer: cross road
5. cycle cycle cycle
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Answer: tricycle
6.
0
————
M.D.
Ph.D.
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Answer: Two degrees below zero
7.
knee
————
light
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Answer: neon [...]