A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn’t seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?” The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy’s voice comes back on the line. He says: “OK, now what?”
In 2002, as a result of Richard Wiseman’s research this became the funniest joke in the whole world. At that time, the joke was submitted by Gurpal Gosall, of Manchester, England.
February 26th, 2007 at 8:42 am
i dont get it… realyl…explain please?
March 1st, 2007 at 11:26 am
IT’S SO FUNNY! The operator was going to tell him to check a pulse or something but instead he shoots him. So even if he wasn’t dead to begin with, he’s dead now. PLEASE DON’T LET MY FRIENDS EVER BE THAT DUMB!! lol.
March 9th, 2007 at 9:42 am
RETARTED
March 27th, 2007 at 7:40 am
This is the gayest joke in the history of man kind, i mean i’m famous and i have heard some retarded jokes before but, this is a whole new level. who ever came up with this joke is a homo. get a life homo!!!!!!
March 30th, 2007 at 5:20 am
its funny but not the funniest in the world
April 14th, 2007 at 3:36 pm
i’m pretty sure you’re not johnny depp dude, and i’m pretty sure johnny depp has a lot more class than to say “get a life homo”.
April 18th, 2007 at 8:08 am
I’ve heard this joke a million times, and it still never gets old.
May 23rd, 2007 at 9:28 am
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA THAT GUY IS SOO STUPID
May 30th, 2007 at 5:40 pm
wow wat a loser the hunter i mean.
June 6th, 2007 at 6:34 pm
this joke is so f@#$% lame it’s not even funny
June 22nd, 2007 at 5:37 pm
‘johnny depp’ isn’t really Jonny Depp, Big Gilley is ‘retarted,’ Earnie5000 doesn’t have the smarts to get it, and Gari speaks English as a second language.
Awesome joke. Maybe not the funniest (to me, opinions are not fact), but definitely up there.
September 17th, 2007 at 7:06 pm
funny!?!!
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:28 pm
did ya’ll know micheal jackson died??
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He ate a 12 year old weiner!!
Now that’s a funny joke!
March 4th, 2008 at 8:16 pm
that is creepy. Wow.
That guy is stupid
May 7th, 2008 at 11:19 am
haha…that’s like kinda a good one….
June 4th, 2008 at 2:30 pm
WOW…. that was the stupidest joke ever.
July 18th, 2008 at 2:27 pm
Greatest joke of all time
January 21st, 2009 at 1:43 am
How many dumbass yanks does it take to vote for Bush anyway?
February 7th, 2009 at 12:49 am
halrious ! I liike it , NOT , I LOVE IT ! best joke evs
February 24th, 2009 at 10:06 am
omg !!!! omg !!!omg!!!! that is like the most REARDED “joke” i have eva heard!!! although io have to admit new jearsiens are pretty STUPID!! LMAO i luv da jok
December 15th, 2009 at 6:14 pm
Funny, but how is that the funniest in the world?
April 25th, 2010 at 7:50 am
y guys r sooo crazzy this joke was wake w.e
May 13th, 2010 at 11:54 am
this joke is stupid not da funniest eva naw way
May 19th, 2010 at 9:50 pm
Kayla Says:
April 14th, 2007 at 3:36 pm
i’m pretty sure you’re not johnny depp dude, and i’m pretty sure johnny depp has a lot more class than to say “get a life homo”.
haha that is funnier than the joke
August 28th, 2010 at 2:22 pm
the funniest thing is it’s came out in 2002. i thought it’s from 1537.
September 28th, 2010 at 10:54 pm
A pretty good joke but This one is way more funnier
THE NUN AND THE HIPPIE
A hippie gets on a bus and spies a pretty young nun. He sits down next to
her, and asks her: “Can we have sex?”
“No,” she replies, “I’m married to God.”
She stands up, and gets off at the next stop.
The bus driver, who overheard, turns to the hippie and says:”I can tell you
how to get to have sex with her!”
“Yeah?”, says the hippie.
“Yeah!”, say the bus driver. “She goes to the cemetery every Tuesday night
at midnight to pray, so all you have to do is dress up in a robe with a
hood, put some of that luminous powder stuff in your beard, and pop up in
the cemetery claiming to be God.”
The hippie decides to give it a try, and arrives in the cemetery dressed as
suggested on the next Tuesday night.
“I am God,” he declares to the nun, keeping the hood low about his face.
“Have sex with me.”
The nun agrees without question, but begs him to restrict himself to anal
sex, as she is desperate not to lose her Virginity.
‘God’ agrees, and promptly has his wicked way with her. As he finishes, he
jumps up and throws back his hood with a Flourish.
“Ha-ha,” he cries. “I’m the hippie!”
“Ha-ha,” cries the nun. “I’m the bus driver!